Where I’ve been the past few weeks

I apologize for the lack of posting the past couple of weeks.

This past week, and the weekend and week prior to it, I worked an insane amount. Basically, I worked two weeks straight including most nights during that time as we closed out our high school graduation special section at the newspaper that Danah and I own.

Working that much is both my greatest strength and my greatest weakness. For the better part of eight years, that’s been my life. And I’m not saying that for sympathy. It’s that way with any start up, and with luck, I’ll be working very little one of these days and you all will hate my guts and I’ll hate the fact that none of you remember how much I sacrificed and how little time I got off. So, I’m not bemoaning the work. It’s an investment and it is just a fact of life when you start a biz from scratch.

But this past two-week blowout really took it out of me. I’m 35 now, and not 27 like I was when I first launched the company, and such a hard sprint/marathon at work really knocks me on my ass. So, I ended this latest crucible completely exhausted and burned out.

I haven’t written, I’ve barely exercised, I’ve tried to get caught up on my sleep with plenty of naps. You ever get that feeling where you don’t want to do anything? I mean anything, but lay around and just feel sorry for yourself?

I’m just been completely busted up and dang-near depressed. No motivation. And the word enthusiasm is a word I’ve forgotten the meaning of. (Yeah, me, Stan… The crazy one… Yes, I had forgotten the meaning of “motivation.” Weird. I know, and I’m flattered you may not believe me. I love the crazy, psycho, delusional Stan as much as you, even if he does beat the crap out of me and get in my face and yell at me on a regular basis.)

And this short-sightedness on my part of working way too hard is why I’m so in love with Eastern Philosophy. I think the East has it right, while the West with our insatiable drive and full-throttle ahead approach is very short sighted. And while I continue to learn these lessons the hard way, I still seem to fall back to repeating my mistakes over and over. Though thankfully, now it’s down to about once a quarter or so. (Maybe eventually I’ll learn my lesson, though I must say that sometimes I can be dense as hell…)

At any rate, this is where I’ve been the past few weeks. Superman/Mighty Mouse has died and turned into broken man/tired boy. And with this transformation, I haven’t been visiting your all’s blogs, haven’t been on Twitter, and haven’t been writing fiction. I’ve probably pushed my book back a full month with this stupidity, and for that I really want to kick myself.

Thankfully, mercifully, the books are still selling well, and I appreciate each and every one of you that have helped me more than I can possibly believe by spreading the word about them, reviewing them, etc.

Believe me, I’m finally starting to recharge and exercise again and I even eked out a few words on the novel on Saturday.

From here on out, I’ll do better about corresponding with you all on the internet here and elsewhere, and I’m going to do my best to get the next Nick Woods novel on track.

Stan R. Mitchell

Oak Ridge, Tenn.

11 Comments

Filed under Stories about my life

11 responses to “Where I’ve been the past few weeks

  1. We’ll let you slide, this time. And 35? I can’t even remember 35. Hang in there Stan. SF.

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    • Hah! Thanks, Mike. And great point about being 35. I’ve been fighting this early mid-life crisis, but I need to remember there are folks in their 90s who probably don’t see my age as the same kind of problem that I do.

      Half-full, not half-empty, right? Thanks again for the big morning cheer up, and likewise, I don’t want to hear you complaining about age either. A Marine of your age should still be eating barbed wire for breakfast! SF.

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  2. Julio Ibanez

    I’m in the same spot and a couple of weeks more overdue for a post than you are. :)

    Glad to see that I’m not necessarily alone (although I have far less excuse than you do!)

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  3. Glad I’m not the only one! My problem has been very sick pets rather than work since April 21 and still ongoing. 35 is nothing, wait till you’re 62. And when I’m 82, I’m sure I’ll look back at 62 and wonder why I didn’t get more done.

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  4. Don’t knock yourself about too much, bud. Do try to get in some exercise, though. You don’t have to do too much, just something to keep shit moving. ;-)

    It always amazes me how working the body a little bit helps the head a lot.

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