I have groupies!!!

I’ve always thought my writing was at least decent, but it turns out I’ve underestimated my skills: My writing is so freaking awesome that I have groupies! : )

No joke!

Take a look at this hot chick here.

And for the guys out there, who suddenly really are paying attention to my blog, I’ll provide a second, hot chick pic below. (I know, she’s pretty damn hot, and yeah, you kind of owe me for that.)

So, why is Stan posting these hot chick pics, I hear you asking… Is he that desperate for page views?!

Well, yeah, I am, but no, that’s not why I’m posting them.

This hot-ass chick, who’ll I’ll call Angie in an effort to protect her identity, apparently loves my books soooo much that she used a company credit card to buy one of my books.

How do I know that? Well, she posted it on facebook and told me. Here’s what she said.

Sooo, apparently I embezzled company money to buy your book! Our books weren’t adding up so a quick audit revealed I used the company credit that was saved on file instead of my personal card to buy your book! I think stealing money from my own company to purchase your book makes me the official groupie of the year!

So, in her defense, she does co-own the company with a partner, so maybe it wasn’t total theft, but let’s not let the facts get in the way of a good story here. (And let’s not forget, she may have been so love-struck with me that she wasn’t thinking straight, and I earn kudos for that kind of power, as well!)

But back to the real point, by my standards what she did makes her a groupie. I mean, she’s hot, she’s addicted to my stuff (oops, poor word choice!), and she’s willing to commit theft, company fraud, and who knows what else to read my latest work.

So, I’ve got to say… Being an author rocks. I mean, I expected the money and the huge fame, but I never expected groupies.

Speaking of which, have you seen how many followers I have! I think it’s like 10 or 20 million! Or is it 100 or 200 million?! Who knows. Tough to keep up, and we authors suck at math and are trained to exaggerate a bit if it helps tell a good story!

In all honesty, I always assumed this only happens to rock stars, but maybe women have a thing for hot authors who are four feet tall! : ) Or, maybe my books are that good! (Let’s hope!) Or, maybe, I’ve got the best friends in the world, and they just get distracted sometimes. : )

Oh, and before I sign off and get blasted by someone, Angie both saw and approved this post. (She’s one of my best friends and was in my wedding.) And my wife Danah knows all about Angie and her groupie activity referred to in this post. (Danah said on my facebook that it made her day!)

Stan R. Mitchell